I have this creativity, this drive, this passion.
It can keep me awake at night.
It burns deep in my soul and no matter what I do I cannot seem to shake it.
I live in this other realm of reality because it consumes me at times.
I will space out, forget where I am, what I was doing.
Some days I don’t even feel like getting out of bed because depression kicks in from me not living my full life.

morning tired disney cartoons & comics tiana

I just do not know what to do to get it out.
I am not sure how to break the barrier and actually become what I feel.
Giving up is way easier than trying to figure it out.

fail dark alone nothing try


I want to be around people who spark that fire, who bring it to the surface and bring forth ideas, goals and results. The movers and shakers, the motivators. Those that are actually forging ahead and making their dreams a reality.
Those people though, tend to be a bit out of my league it seems. I come off as immature, naive, uncertain. I know this. I am a bit awkward when getting to know people.

awkward icarly nickelodeon feel

I am also a bit scatterbrained and extremely forgetful.
My mind is always fifty different places at one time so my focus is not where it should be.
Which is a hindrance when planning, or even with building my business. It is not very professional to run late, forget things, and not keep track of dates. That can be a big deterrent for anyone with any type of drive and focus.
See, I have the drive, and the want, just my lack of focus tends to ruin it all.

Hopefully as I am gaining the knowledge, maturity and awareness everything will begin coming together.



I just truly want to achieve what I know I am capable of.

Rocky champion celebrating win boxing


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