I worked at a bookstore about three years ago and would periodically wander to the “self-help” section to try and seek out advise about my then toxic relationship just hoping that an answer would jump out of the book and help solve the dilemma in my brain.
I saw the book He’s Just Not that Into You with it’s girly cover and flipped through it for a brief second. In my mind it was not worth reading simply because it seemed marketed to a younger audience so I decided to pass it up.
Every time someone bought it I would ponder reading it. I never did though. I had this self righteous attitude about it. I felt I was better than that book, there was no way that frilly book held the answers to the deep questions that I held inside. I love psychology and tend to psychoanalyze a lot of situations. I figured that book would tell me things I already knew.
That’s just it though. I did know the answers to my questions, but was not smart enough or willing to push myself to change my habits and change things I knew needed to be changed. I sat and was miserable with my situation, knew how to fix it, but chose not to because of fear.
That made me think, wait, is that what the books are for? Not so much to tell you things that you already know but to motivate. Reading it, relating and seeing things in a different light triggers something, it challenges sometimes. I dropped my pretentious attitude about “self-help” and started digging deeper.
I started truly wondering why so many people were fascinated with those books and with people like Dr. Phil.
We are truly in a time where there are a lot of lost souls. People pondering their own existence wondering what it all means. People wanting to get it right but not having the tools needed to get it right on their own. As humans continue to evolve our brains start connecting in more ways, feeling things deeper, wanting more substance and I truly think these books are stepping stone for that. These books take a generic look at situations and offer the best solutions based on a culmination of data and experiences. It is up to us to draw from those experience and come up with our own best judgement or answer.
I now have a new found appreciation for “self-help” and all that it entails. I had to open my own mind a bit and realize that it is truly what it says. Self-help, a way of helping yourself, and there is nothing wrong with that.
OH, and as far as He’s Just Not That Into You, I still haven’t truly read the book, but I saw the movie and love it. The movie is smart, witty, and actually has a very valid point. So maybe that means that the book is all that people say it is. I have no need to read it, I am very happy with where I am relationship wise. If I ever have a friend who needs advise, or has questions about relationships I just might recommend they read the book with the pink background and the phone on the cover. Wait, have they changed the cover? Ah well, you get my point ;o]